Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Hubby Has Crossed the Line




DEAR HUBBY,

You did me wrong!! You did me soooo wrong and now I'm going to run your good name through the mud on this blog! 

You said you were going to go to Walmart to pick up my fabric softener. Which you did! (Even though it was the sheets and I only use the liquid but you know what? I wasn't even going to bring that up because it's no big deal. Even though now I have to take those back to get the liquid that you have witnessed me using many times and you would think that you would remember that when you are at the store. But I wasn't even going to say anything bout that. Moving on) 

But what did you bring home and sit on my kitchen counter? 24 deliciously baked, softest ever sugar cookies with cream frosting with cute pink and red heart sprinkles.





I ate 2 right from the start. Ok, 2 I told myself. Not so bad, I can deal with 2. I WONT EAT ANYMORE. 

After dinner, I faltered and ate 1 ... or was it 2 more?

But the hugest betrayal was when you left to go play grown up man games with your little man friend.

And even though I begged you to eat the last of the cookies before you left, YOU REFUSED!

Then you had the nerve to tell me

'just leave them, I'll eat them when I get home'

WHAT! WHAT! I know you DIIII'IIIINNNT!!!


You knew I would never be able to just leave them waiting!!

Yeah, you're gone right now enjoying your little video game and here I am with 4 cookies staring at me!!!

You have messed up!

Here are the ways I plan on getting you back.

1. Put breast milk in your coffee.

2. Tell you I see nicks, fingerprints and chipped paint on your car. I know for sure that will drive you mad. 

But the best revenge will be when you come home and reach for a beautiful cookies only to find that I've eaten them all!!

13 comments:

  1. Ohhhhh, these MEN! They KNOW if they BUY the darned things, we ARE going to EAT them. And if we EAT them, they will go straight to our thighs & butts. And if they go straight to our thighs and butts, they are GOING to notice & say something snide-disguised-as-'helpful' such as, "Sweety, did you accidentally buy the wrong SIZE jeans? Your OTHER ones seemed to fit better." Huh-uh! DON'T tell him you see dents/scratches on his car. Buy a BIG package of heavily frosted cookies (a kind YOU hate so you won't be tempted) and SMEAR them all OVER that car, inside and out! He'll re-think his evil ways while he's hosing down that mess! Go, Sister!!!!! GET HIM!!!!

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    1. LOL Kai, I told my husband about your comment. I think he's afraid now, very afraid :)

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    2. Heehee! Bad, bad Kai!!!!

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  2. It's true. Men seem to enjoy watching us lose all self control when it comes to tasty sweet things we need to stay away from. Evil creatures. I love Kai's enthusiasm. Smearing cookies on his car would be hilarious. If you do that please take pics!

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    1. Lol, I would most certainly take at least 100 pictures!

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  3. Oh my gosh - I'm dying over here! Just shared this on twitter! Thanks for linking up!

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    1. Thank you! I love linking up to Finding the Funny!

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  4. HA, my husband did that to me a few months ago, but it was a whole. bag. of. kit kats. My favorite, which he knows, and they were the snack size, which only makes it easier to rationalize grabbing "just a few more." Hmph. You go - get revenge for us all!!!!

    I'm here from the Finding the Funny hop - and started following! I hope you come to check out my blog, too!

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  5. Ha! Seriously! How could he do such a thing?? I loved the part about him seeing you a thousand times with liquid softener and him buying you the sheets anyway. Hahaha!! That really is great stuff and so, so typical.

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    1. Yes, I bet if I made him do the laundry he would remember! :)

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    2. Good luck with that one! If you have success, let me know. I could use some help! So glad you linked this up with #findingthefunny. :)

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  6. You were one of the top 5 most clicked links at last week's finding the funny party! We're featuring you tomorrow! :)

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