You did me wrong!! You did me soooo wrong and now I'm going to run your good name through the mud on this blog!
You said you were going to go to Walmart to pick up my fabric softener. Which you did! (Even though it was the sheets and I only use the liquid but you know what? I wasn't even going to bring that up because it's no big deal. Even though now I have to take those back to get the liquid that you have witnessed me using many times and you would think that you would remember that when you are at the store. But I wasn't even going to say anything bout that. Moving on)
But what did you bring home and sit on my kitchen counter? 24 deliciously baked, softest ever sugar cookies with cream frosting with cute pink and red heart sprinkles.
I ate 2 right from the start. Ok, 2 I told myself. Not so bad, I can deal with 2. I WONT EAT ANYMORE.
After dinner, I faltered and ate 1 ... or was it 2 more?
But the hugest betrayal was when you left to go play grown up man games with your little man friend.
And even though I begged you to eat the last of the cookies before you left, YOU REFUSED!
Then you had the nerve to tell me
'just leave them, I'll eat them when I get home'
WHAT! WHAT! I know you DIIII'IIIINNNT!!!
You knew I would never be able to just leave them waiting!!
Yeah, you're gone right now enjoying your little video game and here I am with 4 cookies staring at me!!!
You have messed up!
Here are the ways I plan on getting you back.
1. Put breast milk in your coffee.
2. Tell you I see nicks, fingerprints and chipped paint on your car. I know for sure that will drive you mad.
But the best revenge will be when you come home and reach for a beautiful cookies only to find that I've eaten them all!!